The kiln of waiting

The kiln of waiting. 
Without love,  wandering around the endless chores of dusty lungs and braking bones and ground down skin,  and burning flesh.
The purgatory time of waiting and thinking of lost love. 
There is comfort in repeating what has been done a million times by finger ghosts of my ancestors. 
Invited in by the succubus weed to flirt with you down memory lane.  Forgotten beauties that sworn not to be forgotten: the repetitious line
And I dive down into the sticky thick mire of clay and memories,  stuck.... 

And he remembers me from a far with a dramatic "hey,  Sam! How's it going?" like I were being greeted upon my arrival into heaven for the first time.  I see my bowl... " you got old" 
Age and death taking their tax each year until we arrive here.  Where we started.  10 years later in the exact same position,  doing the exact same thing.  Something I swore I would never do. 
This repeating vortex of repeating events that steals a little off of your soul with every pass. 
One moment at a time.  One step in front of each other. 
Driving the same direction,  in the same way we did the same way 10 years ago.  Tired and dirty and ready to explode into something great. 
The tax this year has been great.  There is now less of the substance remaining to explode. 
As I remember the past pleasantness and anxiousness ,  I breathe in deep the thickness of stasis slumbering
There are certain interactions that are inevitable.  And while this memory was a moment of heaven,  the moment of hell will come.  Or maybe it's already been paid. 
The ghost of the cup climbed onto my wrist as I brought my memories into the light.  I flung it away as reflexive fear flung the memory.  Smashing it's essence into shards.  The 8 legged homeless nomad went on its way to another home. 

And every story has always led to,  started from,  or ended with you .  Our beginning and ending will always be my life story.  From the moment when I first saw you,  to the last moment that I will ever see you.  This is my story.  I chose this story. 

Little kids creating

I love the way kids create things on paper.  It's hugely inspiring.  I want to learn to create with the immediacy that they do.  There is more to a face than the lines that make it.  It's all the little stories and tiny details throughout life that create us and change us.  This is a collaboration between little children's hands and my own. 

Making art in the forest

I've always enjoyed interacting with nature and using disorder to create something that is pleasing to my eyes.  Often I'm not choosing to record the moment because what's enjoyable is the act of creation and not in the final product.  This was a a piece of bark that had fallen down.  I saw an image in this decaying material and wanted to bring it out from hiding.  I hung it on the trail for others to hopefully find. 

Travels with sesame

I'm interested in an object that is similar in its combination of small items that make a whole image but captured in only in one  moment. 

There are great moments of beauty in creating when you're totally immersed in the moment.  

The impermanence of anything made on a beach creates a great awareness of the effects of time regularly apart of our lives.  The work has to be finished before the next act of nature or person comes and modifies back to a resting state of natural disorder.  

Smiling is an extremely important experience for my mind to be at peace.  There is something soothing and therapeutic for me when I smile. Also moving heavy rocks to create something physical with my body is also quite good for my mind.  This image of a happy smiling face speaks deeply to me.  There is something very enjoyable about using my entire body to create something spiritual important to me been on the road for a month and I've not posted anything.  I have still been busy making something every day.  I've had to redefine my thoughts on family, friends, and what it's like to have a home.  The paper work reminds me of another time and my whole goal is to stay as present as possible. I'm really excited about making things that are impermanent. People have always been drawn to the water and it's an incredibly awesome experience to stand in front of such great power.  Money has become a replacement for power, but nothing is greater or more powerful than something as large as a great lake.  Something that within itself can turn concrete blocks into sand again. 
In making this representation of happiness,  I felt it important to point out the relationship between what is man made and what is naturally occurring.  Even in this connection,  there can be beauty.  It's completely in perspective. 

Dreaming, dragons, and a dog

I remember first drawing the scales on a dragon when I was a sophomore in high school.   The repetition at the time was frustrating.  Looking back now , I see the foundation for a style to come. There is great freedom in being able to create without worrying about the image.  When ever mark is purposeful, there is nothing incorrect.  There is something that has always been very identifiable about dragons.  The story that I see portrayed in this image is one of a dog sleeping on a woman, and a woman sleeping on something that becomes a dragon while they are dreaming.  A lot of myths about the dragons have them protecting something. Maybe I'm protecting the dreams of the ones sleeping on me.  Or maybe the dragon is my dreams.  The force that protects my life dreams while I'm sleeping until the point in my life that they a able to become realized.  Maybe this is an image about a realized dream trapped in a moment.  The dream of having 2 creatures so full of trust and love for you that they will fall asleep on you.

Dirty inspiration of commonality

I originally was interested in the shapes that were visible in the dirt on the side of the car.  Something about the stark contrast between the dirt and and the bright red was really captivating.  The cool thing about seeing things hidden in every day objects and patterns is that I've noticed it's a improbable skill.  The more you see,  the more you are able to see and with a greater level of detail. It's not only clouds that house wonderful hidden images, but everything around us seems to remind me of something else.  I personally believe that this is the case because of the commonality between everything.  It's all the same atoms, electrons, and basic building blocks that are slightly arranged in a different order.  More interestingly,  I want to know what others see in the drawings that put onto paper.  It's nice to be free enough to let your thoughts wonder and see where they end up.

Faces in the lines

It's a nice feeling to look through a series of lines and see what jumps out from the page.  When each line dictates the next, and when there is a constant desire to achieve spontaneous creations,  it's rewarding to see what is able to come into existence with little help from you.  It gives each peace a sense of being something grander than itself.

Nothing is original, everything is temporary

The concept and desire to achieve originality in art is a continuous struggle.  The attempt to place greater value on some items and declare others as less important seems to be the very antithesis of what creation should be. With the earth's minute impact on the cosmic universe,  it seems almost laughable that we feel we have the authority to claim anything.  When the earth's existence is but a fraction in time compared to that of the cosmos,  it seems ridiculous that anything is possible.  I feel like everything is equally capable of infinite beauty and it's only in how we choose to look at it that it's beauty is revealed. The beauty is capable of being seen in the moments that it is witness.  Any attempt to recreate it is but a ghost or shadow of the original beauty.  While that moment of being is continually fading away, I feel it necessary as the human race to attempt to achieve or replicate those moments.  In this attempt to continuously move forward,  is where the beauty of evolution lives.  The continual progression and improvement of an idea, thought, or species is the very act of creation.  I feel it is wired into our DNA,  and by not attempting to create or improve something we are fighting our very basic animal/ spiritual nature.

Pure joy

I think most people at some point have been surprised at the images that randomly appear in the most unexpected places.  Whether it's Wallpaper patterns, clouds, or tree bark our brains are always looking for the familiar.  In spectacular to witness something transform from the paint that is there.  In the moments where thoughts stop and you're able to be present is where I believe all art lives.  In the expression of our souls connectedness to this moment is a wonderful thing that is often overlooked and replaced instead with the future story or past histories.  In these moments of creation,  I feel like a honored spectator witnessing the present moment as it happens and recording my interpretation of it. 

Sections.

Today I was able to touch and contribute to a good majority of my work.  It feels great to feel life being represented and expressed through my hands.  This is the feeling of joy.  Creating and creation are incredible things to be apart of.

First post

I was wanting to allow others to share in the benefits that I experience while I am creating things.
I thought the option to attach labels to my post was ironic in the fact that I'm looking to avoid labels as much as possible in describing what I do. 
I'm looking to understand the moments in life that change the way we breathe.  I feel like I've found "God" in the moments between inhaling and exhaling.  When there is something that takes our breath away, I feel that "God" is looking to express a concept greater than words and I feel it is our responsibility to pause in that moment and experience it.